Tag Archives: Sacrifice

The Life of David Gale

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Constance Harraway: The TA just finished transcribing all the governor’s radio and TV comments. Listen to this gem: Journalist – “Governor, don’t you think three executions in one week is a little excessive?” Governor – “I say let’s bring them in, strap them down, and rock and roll.”
David Gale: Oh, it’s good to know our governor is in touch with his inner frat boy.
 
 
The Life of David Gale
 
David Gale to Bitsey Bloom: We spend our whole life trying to stop death. Eating, inventing, loving, praying, fighting, killing. But what do we really know about death? Just that nobody comes back. Then there comes a point – a moment – in life when your mind out lives its desires, its obsessions, when your habits survive your dreams, and when your losses… Maybe death is a gift. You wonder. All I can tell you is that by this time tomorrow I’ll be dead. I know when. I just cannot say why. You have 24 hours to find out.

How many innocent men and women end up being put to death in our justice system?  In a day and age of DNA testing and a multitude of forensic analysis methods…  it seems just about impossible that it could happen.

In The Life of David Gale, reporter Bitsey Bloom (Kate Winslet) is called in to interview a man, David Gale (Kevin Spacey), who is about to be executed for rape and murder of his friend Constance Harraway (Laura Linney) in Texas.  Gale spent his life working with an anti-death penalty group “Death Watch” until he was accused of raping a student and was asked to step back to prevent his sullied reputation from tainting that of the group.

As Gale tells Bitsey the story, she begins to question her own convictions about Gale’s guilt.  In fact, she begins to dig deeper trying to find proof of his innocence to prevent his untimely death.  Ultimately, The Life of David Gale shows us that there is a definite possibility that in the rush to find out who committed a crime, innocent people are being sent to prison, and especially to death row.

This film is nearly impossible to talk about without really spoiling things for the viewer.  So, I won’t delve into the movie itself too much, just pose some questions to think about as you watch:

How do you really feel about the death penalty?  It seems that most Catholics (and I might say even Christians) are pro-life when it comes to abortion, and for many even contraception.  However, when it comes to the death penalty, many are on the fence, feeling that the convicts deserve death – especially with the thoughts that it is cheaper to kill them than to let them serve life in prison.  So, take a minute and think about your true feelings about the death penalty.

Does the death penalty prevent prisoners the chance to find God and repent? 

Does killing a killer really prevent more death?

What does the Bible say?  There are many references to punishments of death for various crimes in the old testament, but Jesus’s teachings definitely take a softer approach to the old law.

What does the Catechism say?  CCC #2267 Assuming that the guilty party’s identity and responsibility have been fully determined, the traditional teaching of the Church does not exclude recourse to the death penalty, if this is the only possible way of effectively defending human lives against the unjust aggressor.
If, however, non-lethal means are sufficient to defend and protect people’s safety from the aggressor, authority will limit itself to such means, as these are more in keeping with the concrete conditions of the common good and more in conformity to the dignity of the human person.
Today, in fact, as a consequence of the possibilities which the state has for effectively preventing crime, by rendering one who has committed an offense incapable of doing harm – without definitely taking away from him the possibility of redeeming himself – the cases in which the execution of the offender is an absolute necessity “are very rare, if not practically nonexistent.” 

The filmmaker tried to stay neutral although he has definite anti-death penalty views.  Did this film seem neutral to you?

Did this film affect your views on the death penalty?

Does your state allow the death penalty?  How often is it carried out?  According to the filmmakers, California actually has more inmate on death row than Texas, but Texas kills more inmates per year.  Does that surprise you?

“An almost martyr doesn’t count”  In a debate with the Texas Governor, Gale is stumped when the Governor offers to abolish the death penalty if Gale can name one innocent person that was put to death.  And, every person whose execution is staid due to new evidence shows that the system can work.  So the quote arises, “An almost martyr doesn’t count.”  When Bitsey really starts to put things together and see that Gale may not really be who he’s been portrayed, she tells him that he should have contact her sooner, that she needs more time.  Gale replies, “You’re not here to save me.  You’re here to save my son’s memory of his father.”  Could you sacrifice yourself for your ideals?  Do you see Gale as a martyr for the cause?  What about Constance?

Ratings and wrap up:  The Life of David Gale is rated “R” for good reason.  Graphic nudity, sex and language get it there without any question.  The partying, Gale’s drinking problem, the idea that more lovers is a good thing and the dirty limericks don’t help.  It is not for the faint hearted.  It is not one I’d be likely to show in a group setting, but in my opinion, even though it is hard to watch, it will make it more understandable that it is possible for an innocent person to die for a crime they did not commit.

The Green Mile

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Paul Edgecomb: On the day of my judgment, when I stand before God, and He asks me why did I kill one of his true miracles, what am I gonna say? That it was my job? My job?

The Green Mile Movie Poster from IMDB.com

The Green Mile Movie Poster from IMDB.com

John Coffey: You tell God the Father it was a kindness you done. I know you hurtin’ and worryin’, I can feel it on you, but you oughta quit on it now. Because I want it over and done. I do. I’m tired, boss. Tired of bein’ on the road, lonely as a sparrow in the rain. Tired of not ever having me a buddy to be with, or tell me where we’s coming from or going to, or why. Mostly I’m tired of people being ugly to each other. I’m tired of all the pain I feel and hear in the world everyday. There’s too much of it. It’s like pieces of glass in my head all the time. Can you understand?
Paul Edgecomb: Yes, John. I think I can. 
 

The Green Mile is one of those movies that almost leaves its viewers with more questions than answers.  It’s been on my list of movies to write about for a while, and is the first request I’m finally getting to fulfill.

The film starts off with the main character, Paul, played by Tom Hanks, as an old man in a nursing facility.  He breaks down in tears watching an old Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers movie and a friend from the home tries to console him.  So, he tells her the story of the a year of his life as a prison guard on Death Row at Cold Mountain Penitentiary.  While death row is typically called “the last mile” they called theirs “the green mile” due to the floor color.

Two inmates already reside the mile.  And we’re never really told what they’ve done.  But things really get interesting with John Coffey (played by Michael Clarke Duncan) is brought in.  He is huge – and has been convicted of a horrible crime, raping and murdering two little girls.  They expect him to be hard to handle, but they find that he is quiet, gentle and quite opposite from what they imagined. They even learn he is afraid of the dark.

It isn’t long before another inmate, known as “Billy the Kid” is brought to the mile He is juvenile in his antics, but proves himself quite dangerous very early in his stay. He is a huge contrast to the sweet and quiet John Coffey. Add to all this, one guard, Percy, who is angry and bitter.  He beats on prisoners, believing them to be sub-human and looking for ways to control them.  When they actually need him to take action, he can’t.

Paul begins to doubt that John has committed the crime he’s been convicted of, but it isn’t until John heals Paul of a bladder infection, that Paul really starts doing some digging.  He doesn’t mention the healing to anyone but later events leave witnesses of other miracle healings. More and more they are convinced that John could not have committed the crime he is convicted of.  This film is full of talking points – and I’m sure it would take multiple posts to really go into all of them, but here’s a start:

All people deserve to be treated with dignity:  Most of the guards are very careful about how they talk to and handle the prisoners.  The do not condone physical or verbal abuse.  They say that staying calm and talking the prisoners prevents issues with already tense prisoners.  They are very careful to find distractions for the prisoners being executed while they practice the execution process.  Even to the end, they do everything they can to make the execution as clean, quick and calm as possible.  You know they don’t enjoy killing these men.  In contrast, we see Percy who is mean to the prisoners and treats them as scum.  He doesn’t care about them beyond how his poor treatment makes him feel superior.  But what this difference shows is how when treated with respect, most of the prisoners are peaceful and lovable.  When situations are tense do we tend to lash out, or do we try to keep things calm?  What about when you encounter someone that scares you?  I believe in most cases, you’ll find it that even though you may want to react like Percy, you’ll find the typical way of the guards gets much farther with much less uproar…  Granted, most of us don’t have padded rooms we can throw people in who disrespect us, but for the most part, they handled everything through calm and even a little humor, when appropriate.

Child-like nature:  One thing I’ve noticed each time I’ve watched The Green Mile is the child-like nature of the prisoners.  Is that because they are somehow emotionally or mentally stunted and their lack of maturity is what led to the crimes that landed them there.  I find myself wondering if you peel back the layers of our current prison inmates, that you’d find certain similarities.

At the same time, John’s gift of being able to heal, seems to be in a strange package. But, as we see in scripture, God always chooses someone that we wouldn’t expect. John is dirty, sweaty, uneducated – but gentle and truly caring.  Once you see John in action, you know there is no way he could have committed the heinous acts he is sentenced to death for.

The death penalty:  Well, if you are on the fence about the electric chair, this film will definitely show you how violent a death it really is – even without the disastrous one. None of the inmates deny what they’ve done and I’m sure their crimes were heinous, but seeing them as the men in the cell – relatively childlike and powerless, it was hard to see them killed.

St. Christopher reference:   When John Coffey first arrives at the prison, the prison wagon appears to be riding extremely low.  And John is a BIG guy, but as I watched the scene (and having seen it several times before) it struck me as an analogy to St. Christopher.  For those not familiar with the Christopher story, the basics are that Christopher was crossing a river and a child asked to be carried across.  The child was unbelievably heavy.  Later it was understood that in carrying the child, he was carrying Christ who was carrying the whole world.  So, when I saw that prison wagon carrying such a load, it made me wonder.  Then later, one of those healed gives John a St. Christopher medal, suggesting the St. Christopher would protect him. What do you make of it?  Is John supposed to represent Christ?

If he is meant to be a Christ figure, it certainly explains the healings and the profound sadness he shows about how people treat each other.  It also explains the low riding wagon.  Could it be that John Coffey was supposed to be such a big figure physically to show us how big Christ is figuratively.  Of course, if that was the case, I would have thought John Coffey would have bigger…  but  At first I wondered why John would choose to die… but then I realized Jesus did just that. I’m sure he could have gotten himself out of his situation, but he did it for us.  That is the big difference between Jesus and John Coffey…  Coffey was escaping.  Jesus suffered and died for us!

Sweet, gentle John Coffey also sets into motion events that I always thought exacted revenge, which disappointed me…  however, looking as him as a Christ figure, I’m guessing it could be called “judgment” or at least helping put them before God for His judgment.

In conclusion:  The Green Mile is rated R for violence, language and sexual references – and deservedly so.  It does however, provide a lot of food for thought.  Think about the difference in how the guard and the prisoners interact in comparison with how you look at the people you encounter in your life.  Think about how we are called to love, and that love is not a weakness, but evil does try to exploit it and we cannot let it win!  Think about the implications of the death penalty.  Think about what you would do if you were John Coffey or Paul Edgecomb.  If you can do that, I’m sure you’ll learn something!

The Boy in the Striped Pajamas

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Shmuel: I wish you’d remembered the chocolate.
Bruno: Yes, I’m sorry. I know! Perhaps you can come and have supper with us sometime.
Shmuel: I can’t, can I? Because of this.
[points the electric fence]

The Boy in the Striped Pajamas - image thanks to IMDB.com

The Boy in the Striped Pajamas – image thanks to IMDB.com

Bruno: But that’s to stop the animals getting out, isn’t it?
Shmuel: Animals? No, it’s to stop people getting out.
Bruno: Are you not allowed out? Why? What have you done?
Shmuel: I’m a Jew.
 
Bruno: There is such thing as a nice Jew, though, isn’t there?
Herr Liszt: I think, Bruno, if you ever found a nice Jew, you would be the best explorer in the world.

At more than one point in history groups of people have viewed other groups of people as less than human.  One could argue that this attitude still remains, whether it is looking down on immigrants who come to the country through less than legal means, those who starve in a distant country, those condemned to a life of slavery and those in the womb.

The Boy in the Striped Pajamas beautifully shows how we aren’t born with these prejudices, they are taught.  Most of the time, these teachings aren’t as blatant as what is portrayed here.  But it is a slippery slope.

The film revolves around two boys, Bruno and Shmuel.  Bruno’s parents have recently moved close to the concentration camp that Bruno’s father is in charge of.  You can see that Bruno’s mother is disturbed by the move, but everyone (and she herself) tries to convince her that it’s all okay.  Shmuel obviously recently moved to the area as well, except as a prisoner.  

 The lessons here are incredibly obvious, but still worth talking about”

We are what we know: Bruno and his sister , Gretel are isolated.  Bruno desperately seeks children to play with and spots a “farm” from his bedroom window with lots of children.  As he questions the adults about the “farm” they either ignore his questions or just tell him it’s off-limits.  But, he finally gets a chance (without permission) to go exploring and finds the “farm” for himself and meets Shmuel.  In his schooling, he is taught about who awful the Jews are, and how they are responsible for all that is wrong in the world.  But his friendship with Shmuel keeps seeds of doubt planted.  Gretel, on the other hand, is immersed in the teaching and is soon seen lining her bedroom walls with Nazi propaganda.

Looking back, we wonder how anyone could have those sort of thoughts about other humans, but, that was what was being taught by a few angry people with influence, who passed that teaching on, and so on and so forth.  So, it was what people knew.  In teaching religious education classes students often commented on how they didn’t understand how their friends from other faiths could believe the things they did.  And, being in the “buckle of the bible belt” they were tired of answering the same questions about Catholic beliefs and traditions.  I often had to remind them that being raised in a Catholic home, the Catholic faith made sense and vice-versa for their non-Catholic friends.  At one point in time many people thought slavery made sense, and it still happens in many places we don’t want to talk or think about.  Ultimately, it needs to not be about what we are taught by society, but by our Catholic morality.  If we follow that, we will always recognize the dignity of human life.

We also have to take the time to learn about both sides of any story.  It is the only way to be able to make informed decisions, argue any point or just be a more empathetic people.  It may be that learning the whys and hows of the other side, may help us better understand and articulate something we were already pretty sure of!

If it had been just one man, I’m sure something would have been done.  Okay, so I had to sort of laugh at this one.  The kids are reading a book out loud about “the Jew” and how terrible “the Jew” is.  In this context, “the Jew” is referring to the entire Jewish race.  But when the kids’ tutor points out that “if it had been just one man, I’m sure something would have been done” I was thinking, that it was once one man, one Jew, and they did do something!  They crucified him!  But he still influences the world!

Not everyone believes the same thing, but may be afraid to speak out for fear or repercussions: Bruno’s Grandmother is definitely not happy about the agenda of the Nazi party, or her son’s part in it.  She even blames herself saying that the costumes she made him as a child must have made him want to don the uniform he wears so proudly.    But, he reminds her that airing her views so publicly could get her into a lot of trouble.  Even Bruno’s mother has an issue with what she sees happening, but she just tries not to see it.  So, we have to keep this in mind.  We can say “why didn’t someone do / say something” but we have to realize that not everyone is free to do so…  that’s why we have martyrs, but not everyone is willing to make that sacrifice.

All life is valuable and disrespect for it leads to trouble for all:  Where do you draw the line?  The Nazi’s first started with a small group, but as time went on, they continually opened their net wider and wider.  Many wars were aimed at soldiers fighting each other and deaths of women and children were incidental…  but as time has gone on and warfare had changed, there is not much of a distinction.  Why is it that we can recognize life in the womb if the mother wanted it, but so many can disregard it if the mother doesn’t want it, or if it’s in the first few weeks of gestation?

Interesting to note:  There is a definite cinematic element to this film showing a warmth when the family is in Berlin, compared with a cold, grey, modern house when they move to the country.  My guess would be that this was on purpose, showing the difference as you get closer to the coldness of the camp and the death that lies inside it.  What do you think?

More questions for consideration and reflection:

  • What people are at risk of this type of persecution today?
  • What can we do to prevent this sort of thing from happening again?
  • What is something you realize you need to learn more about?
  • What prejudices do we have that we need to work on ourselves?

Personally, I think we are diluting ourselves to think that this type of thinking is incapable today, so we should remind ourselves of the horrors periodically.  The movie is rated PG-13 for mature thematic elements about the Holocaust.  It probably wouldn’t interest younger viewers, but there really isn’t anything that would give a child nightmares or something like that.  The worst is when one of the jews is pouring wine for dinner and accidentally knocks over a glass and is drug out and beaten (away from camera view).  Ultimately, it is moving, beautiful and shows a beautiful friendship between two unlikely friends.

Movies to Start Pro-Life Discussions…

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As October barrels down on us, I am reminded that October is Pro-Life month.  My womb to tombmind has bounced all over trying to decide which pro-life movies to review, especially showing the “womb to tomb” aspect…  So, this post may be as much a chance to help me gather these thoughts, but also serve as an overview of several movies that I hope to be able to show in more detail later (and some that have already been done).  They may not all actually portray Pro-Life attitudes, but can still be used for discussion.  Remember in past posts where I’ve said that sometimes the lesson is doing the opposite of what is portrayed in the film.  This list is in no way comprehensive, but it’s a start.

Death penalty:

  • Dead Man Walking (R):  I’ll admit, I haven’t seen this one…  but It’s on my list to watch.  A man has committed unspeakable crimes, but as he sits on death row Sister Prejean works to have his execution stayed and befriends him.
  • The Life of David Gayle (R):  a consensual sexual encounter followed by suicide is staged as a rape and murder to prove that even with video and DNA evidence, an innocent person can be sentenced to the death penalty.

Euthanasia:

  • Million Dollar Baby (PG-13):  **CAUTION**  This one comes down on euthanasia as mercy killing.  When a young boxer who has fought her way into the ring, is injured so badly she is faced with life being bedridden and unable to even care for herself, she asks her manager to end her life.  The film wants the viewer to see euthanasia as good, but a case can definitely be made that considering her fighter spirit that had overcome so much, she gave up way too easily.  So, there’s a lot to discuss here.

Insurance reform / quality care for those in need:

  • John Q (PG-13):  Desperate for a heart transplant for his son and being blocked by red tape at every turn, a man takes the ER hostage until they agree to perform the surgery.  Then, when an organ isn’t available, he sets things in motion to serve as his son’s donor, though it will mean losing his life.  Again, this is a launchpad for discussion…  not something you’ll want to show without talking about it at length.

Dignity of Human Life:

  • Horton Hears a Who (G):  The line repeated over and over in this movie is “A person’s a person, no matter how small.”  Horton the elephant hears talking coming from a flower and is driven to protect it, even though every other animal in the jungle thinks that he has lost his mind.
  • The Incredibles (PG):  “Valuing life is not weakness…and disregarding it is not strength.”  This line from Mr. Incredible, who is accused of weakness because he won’t kill the bad guy’s assistant to get his way shows a profound respect for human life (as the good guys usually do).
  • Ice Age (PG):  Instead of abandoning an orphaned human child, A mammoth, a sloth and a tiger set out on a journey to take the child to someone who can care for him.
  • The Boy in the Striped Pajamas (PG-13):  The story of an unlikely friendship between two boys, one German, one Jew.  Set during the Holocaust, the German boy is being taught all about the inferiority of the Jewish race, but he comes to see that none of it is true.

Abortion:

  • Bella:  A woman set on abortion spends time with a former soccer player who is trying to make amends for a past incident.  He convinces her to choose life by agreeing to raise her child for her while giving her the opportunity to change her mind along the way.
  • Juno:  Juno heads into an abortion clinic, but the small bit of trivia about the baby having finger nails sends her running out.  So she finds adoptive parents in the Penny Saver and continues her high school schooling as a pregnant teen despite ridicule and frustration at her condition.  Juno is crass and full of herself, but is still genuinely concerned for the future of the baby.
  • October Baby:  An abortion survivor sets out on a journey to find her birth mother.  Along the way she finds out more about her birth, too.  She offers her mother the forgiveness she never allowed herself.  See the review I did on this one earlier here.
  • Cider House Rules:  **CAUTION** This one is really pro-abortion.  However, I think that the conversations and situations in the movie can be a good launchpad for discussion, especially in those extreme cases that are thrown out to support abortion agendas.  A boy raised in an orphanage is the assistant to a doctor who performs abortions for women who feel they have no choice.  The boy argues with the doctor about his actions, and maintains a pro-life stance until he encounters a girl who is pregnant by incest.
  • The Way:  It’s a small part of the story, but one of the pilgrims encountered on The Way of St. James admits to having an abortion to prevent her abusive husband from having another woman to beat on.  She goes on to talk about imagining what the child would be doing and the life she never had.  See the review I did on this one earlier here.
  • How to Deal:  A teenager discovers she’s pregnant after her boyfriend dies in a freak incident.  She chooses life, and endures the humiliation of being a pregnant teen with the support of the main character who makes it clear that she would not have made the same decision.  Again, this is a good one for the discussion, but cannot stand on it’s own as pro-life because so many push for abortion.

I know there is NO way this is all of the movies regarding life issues out there.  I mean think about all those military or action flicks where the heroes are trying to save humanity, even if it means a few human lives are lost…  or all those that struggle with a difficult diagnosis, and overcome it all to do more with their lives than they ever thought possible.  All are a part of the battle for life, and all boil down to love of neighbor.  If we all did a better job of that, would the rest even be an issue??

In my search for more ideas about films regarding life issues, I came across two sites listed below with lots of recommendations you might find helpful, especially if you check out the comments.

Hopefully I’ll be able to elaborate more on these as time goes on, but hopefully this will help for now.  Blessings!

Unstoppable

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Ned Oldham: Connie. Yeah, it’s Ned.Unstoppable
Connie: Did you throw that switch yet?
Ned Oldham: Yeah, six minutes ago. But your train, it’s not here. I thought it might be going a little slower than you guessed, but these two numb nuts that you sent, they just showed up and they ain’t seen it either.
Connie: Are you saying our train’s already passed?
Ned Oldham: Yes, ma’am. That’d be my guess.
Connie: It’s not a coaster. That train’s under power.
Ned Oldham: That’d be my guess, too.
 

In the movie, Unstoppable, Denzel Washington, Chris Pine and Rosario Dawson star in this action film where a chemical laden runaway train has to be stopped before potential disaster.  The film is “inspired by true events” and although is critiqued for its unrealistic details, is still a gripping and entertaining film if you’re willing to let those details go.

Denzel Washington plays engineer Frank Barnes on his way out (involuntarily) and Chris Pine plays Will Coleson who is just coming in as a conductor.  A failure to pay attention to detail and then a backhanded method of trying to fix it by the guys at the yard, as well as lack of full disclosure of the problem, sets things in motion and a minor issue starts a chain of events that leads to potential disaster.

Not for you:  How often in life do we do something that will benefit someone, but ultimately also benefit someone with whom you have issues?  

Oscar Galvin: I am not going to jeopardize any more property or personnel just because some engineer wants to play *hero*! Now you stop your pursuit or I will fire you!
Frank: [chuckles] Fire… You already did.
Oscar Galvin: Already did what?
Frank: You’ve already fired me. I received my 90 day notice in the mail… 72 days ago.  Forced early retirement. Half benefits.
Galvin: So, you’re going to risk your life for us with three weeks left.
Frank: Not for you. I’m not doing it for you.
 

I’m sure if you think about it, it happens more frequently that you realize.  I have always wanted to do a good job for my clients, my parish, my students, whatever the case may be, and sometimes that meant helping someone I didn’t want to help or making them look good.  IE: That boss or co-worker who always takes the credit.  I keep trying to keep Matthew 6:6’s statement on prayer and apply it to this need to tell people who’s really doing the work:

“When you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, who love to stand and pray in the synagogues and on street corners so that others may see them. Amen, I say to you, they have received their reward.”
 

Normally, those things irritate us to no end, but there’s usually not life at stake. Are you content to stand back and just do your job or do you need to be the hero? Why?  Frank and Will head in to something unbelievably dangerous because they feel like it’s the right thing to do.  They had every right not to do it; the potential of fired, one life had already been claimed (you’ll see), and everything seemed to be going against them, but they felt compelled to do it anyway.  We’re all focused on who we’re really working for – that’s good, very good!  We just have to keep reminding ourselves who we’re really doing our work for – and hopefully God is at the top of the list!

Cooperation is a REQUIREMENT!  One thing about this movie, whether it’s in the relationship background stories or the way they handle the runaway train, is how much cooperation is needed.  We see what happens when people work together… and what happens when they think they know it all and don’t need anyone. I always hated group work as a student, but professionally, I love a team atmosphere and team work.  When everyone gels, massive things get done – but if one person holds back, or insists on their way, it certainly makes things difficult! In what ways are you a team player?  In what ways are you not?  What can you do to help that?  We’re all called to share our gifts to build up the body of Christ!!!  If we all used our gifts as God calls us to, we can do AMAZING things to bring others to Him.  Let’s get moving!!

When you’re in an argument with someone, sometimes you have to imagine how you’d feel if they were in danger.  Would the argument matter? Will and his wife have had a bit of a “misunderstanding.”  This misunderstanding has led to a restraining order and Will sleeping on his brother’s couch.  But, we see that when Will’s wife realizes that Will is in definite danger, the misunderstanding melts away and we are led to understand they worked things out.  As much as I don’t want to sometimes, when the hubs and I argue, I try to keep this in mind before either of us leaves the house.  Would I really want angry words to be our last to each other?  I’m not saying bury the issues. Remember that deep down you love each other and keep that in mind even though you might not like each other very much at the moment.  Obviously, this can also apply to other relationships…  Parents and children, siblings, friends, etc. all have to remember this.  So, is there someone in your life that you need to reconcile with before they are taken from this earth and you lose your chance?

Do you “quit too easy?”  When Will tells the story of his marriage woes and his attempts to reconcile with his wife, Frank tells him that he (Will) quit too easily. Sound familiar?  Many people seem to forget that there is work to making a marriage.  Don’t get me wrong, some people seem to have to work harder than others, but there is a need to communicate feelings, finances and everything else. I have friends who laugh about the “marriage is work” statement because they never felt it was work, but I promise, whether it was conscious or not, they have to work on it.  They have four kids and another due any day.  The kids are in scouting, sports and all that.  They still talk to each other, have “date nights” and its more than just coordinating kids schedules. But, they’ve found a balance that works for them and they’ve got it down in such a way they don’t find it to be work.  Again, this concepts applies to more than just marriage.  It can be a job, relationship, a goal, whatever…  You may have a long-lasting marriage, but do you “quit too easy” about something else?

We’re all God’s children:  At one point, Frank and Will are discussing families and we hear that Frank’s daughters are Hooter’s waitresses (there are a few shots of them at the restaurant, too).  Will raises an eyebrow and asks how Frank feels about that.  Frank says he has gotten used to it, but you can tell he’s not happy about it.  As “men” they “love” Hooters, but as a father, not so much.  So, this can be a good opportunity to show how people react to how we present ourselves AND help us to remember that we are all children of God. Whether it’s a man checking out a scantily clad woman or the reverse, we have to remember that object we’re ogling is a child of God – and how would he feel about us objectifying one of His children that way?  This is a responsibility we all bear.  This is not just a “women cover yourselves” issue.  We all play a part.

Not a whole lot of places to go.  One thing about a train is how it cannot run without it’s track.  There’s no jumping off track and running cross country or even down a standard highway.  When it goes off the track, it’s usually pretty bad. That’s why when we say things like “we’re on track” or “we’re heading down the right track”, it indicates things are good.  When we get off track, it’s usually not good.  What things make up your track?  What helps keep you on track?  What knocks you on track?  What do you do to get back on track when you get derailed?

What high speed train is running through your life right now?  How are you handling it?  Cut it off from up front?  Trying to derail it?  Grab it from behind?  What has been your experience with it?

Triple seven – what does it mean?  777 has been considered to be the perfect number, which is why 666 is supposed to be the “mark of the beast” (three time falls short of 7) – so, do you think there might be some significance in that number being chosen as the runaway train and not 1206 which is the train that they use to try to stop 777.  Triple seven is obviously is extremely powerful – blowing through train cars as if they were tissue paper and flying down the track.  Do you think it was intentional – or just convenient?  Is it a way of saying that God is unstoppable and that whatever we think we can do to control the situation is nothing compared to His power?  What other meanings might it have?

It’s a wrap:  I have to admit, when I threw my copy of Unstoppable in the Blu-ray I wasn’t sure what I was going to be able to glean from it…  I just enjoy it and felt drawn to write on it.  This is not a kids movie by any stretch.  It is rated PG-13 with good reason, the language being the worst – and for the most part, the foul language is limited to the characters responsible for the runaway train, but it is a high-pressure situation, so the f-word flies around a bit.  The only thing sexual is watching Frank’s girls in their short shorts and skin tight clothes.  It is an intense film, but not violent or gory.  So it should be okay for adolescents – but as always, review it first.

Blessings!

We Bought A Zoo

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We Bought A Zoo

image borrowed from IMDB.com

Duncan Mee: I like the animals. I love the humans.

Benjamin Mee: You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.

We Bought A Zoo is a great family flick.  Benjamin Mee, played by Matt Damon is a recent widower trying to raise his two kids on his own.  He decides a change is in order due to a series of events: His son Dylan, whether due to his mom’s death or just teenage melancholy, has a very dark style and has exceeded the three strike policy at his school;  Add that to feeling like a piece of meat thanks to all the single moms at his kids’ school;  Then throw in quitting his job because he’s been given the impression that the only reason he still has it is due to sympathy for his wife’s death.  So, after a horrible day house hunting, they find the perfect house, however, they find it’s part of a defunct zoo.  How hard can it really be???

So with all its heartwarming charm, cast of crazy characters and a few temperamental animals, what lessons can we glean from We Bought A Zoo.

Don’t use people’s sympathies against them:  Dylan is going through a rough time.  No one would doubt that for a minute.  However, he uses it, and plays on it.  He wallows in it, expects everyone else to navigate the minefield he has thrown down.  He even says that no one would expel a kid who just lost their mom.  Now, I’m not saying that Dylan doesn’t have good cause to grieve.  And everyone handles grief differently, but the expectation that everyone will cut him slack indefinitely is a little hard to defend.  And, as Dylan finds out, over time, patience wanes and he won’t always have his grief as a “get out of jail free card.”  So what do you do?

You just need twenty seconds of insane courage:  This is one of the main lines you hear in the trailer, as well as a few times through the movie.  But, its true, isn’t it?  Twenty seconds are actually a long time  – especially when the blood is pumping and that “fight or flight” response kicks in.  In the case of the Mees, they are referring to matters of the heart.  But, that twenty seconds can also be used to speak up in the face of injustice, leap into action in an emergency, volunteer your gifts, etc.  Now, that twenty seconds doesn’t include the thinking time, so don’t use it as an excuse to do something you really shouldn’t.  But when push comes to shove, it only takes twenty seconds to say “yes,” to act in whatever way you’re being called to.  Then, if you take twenty seconds, it might give someone else twenty seconds and so on.  Sometimes just knowing you’re not alone, is the small push that others need, too.

Think about this too in the case of evangelization and missionary work.  I was recently talking to one of my former students who has signed up to be a college missionary.  In their training, they were dropped on a beach and told to go spread the Gospel.  Going to talk to complete strangers is hard enough and then you throw in trying to talk to them about God and His good news!  Admit it – would you do it?

I like the animals.  I love the humans:  When I think about this one, the old bumper sticker “The more people I meet, the more I like my dog” springs to mind…and you expect the zoo staff to have that same philosophy.  The Zoo is full of lots of exotics – both animals and people.  They all make for some pretty interesting events. But, with the exception of the aged lion, the animals are really just a backdrop.  It’s the interaction between the human species that really makes things work.  The support they give each other in spite of their vast differences and idiosyncrasies is really amazing, and they are all pushed by a common goal.  They have a camaraderie that makes them more like a family. They genuinely love each other.  They spend off time together, the whole bit.  A couple of times we see the question posed, “If you had to choose animals or people, which would you choose?” And, despite the love and care shown to the animals, the people win.  So, what do you think you’d choose? 

Next, I’ve noticed that there seems to be a lot of people who show more care and concern for animals than they do for humans.  Ironically, most animal rights people I know are avidly pro-choice.  So, an animal gets better treatment than a human?  How does that work? Now, don’t get me wrong…  I’m pro-life and love animals.  I’ve always had at least one dog, several horses, and have even been around quite a few cows, pigs and chickens and definitely don’t like to see them scared, or in pain.  Loosing our “first-born” chocolate lab mix a few months ago has been really hard, but my love for a being that’s not even the same species helps me know that the power of love is much stronger than we give it credit for.  But, the horrors of what happens during an abortion takes precedent.  There are so many people paying huge amounts of money for babies – and yet so many women feel like they have no other option.  Sadly, I think more than anything, those women are afraid that if they carry a baby to term, they’ll develop that love and they are trying to spare themselves the potential hurt of giving up someone they love or upsetting their current way of life.

When you do something for the right reasons, nothing can stop you:  So, more than once Benjamin is accused of being out of his mind for buying and thinking he could handle running the zoo.  But, its out of love for his children that he is driven to make it work.  He wants them to have the adventure.  He probably (although it’s not stated) is hoping to give them something else to focus on than their grief.  And since they have moved to an area that is relatively distant from the conveniences of town, it might even be something for the kids to do.  But ultimately it’s love – the pure, unconditional love of a father for his children. 

Tree in the road:  (Spoiler alert!!)  So, at the end, they are all ready to open, the rain has lifted, but no one is coming…  their worst fear.  But its Dylan’s faith that says that there’s something wrong.  A tree has fallen blocking the drive to the park, so no one can get to the entrance.  So, you’ve got the right reasons, you’ve accomplished the impossible, but what trees are still in your road?  Do you accept them as a roadblock, or to you charge out to get over?

So, We Bought A Zoo is rated PG, features the talents of Matt Damon, Scarlett Johansson, and Thomas Hayden Church among many others and with the exception is of the zoo inspector being called or referred to as d— and a little bit of kissing is very clean and a lot of fun.  Benjamin’s assertion that “he had the real thing” when his brother tries to encourage him to get permiscuous is encouraging and is a good example of what love really is.  It might be a little deep for really young viewers, but for those old enough, it is one full of lessons that I’d like my kids to know.

Want to see more about We Bought A Zoo?  Check out http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1389137/

I,Robot

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Dr. Calvin:       A Robot can no more harm a human than man can walk on water.
Det. Spooner: Well, there was this one guy a long time ago…
 
Image borrowed from IMDB.com

Image borrowed from IMDB.com

I,Robot begins with Detective Del Spooner flashing back to an accident he had some time before.  This incident leads him to a severe distrust of robots and focuses him on their shortcomings.  However, robots are something that the culture of the time has come to rely on and since they understand them to be limited by the Three Laws of Robotics, feels completely unthreatened by.

The Three Laws of Robotics:
  1. A robot can not harm a human being.
  2. A robot has to obey any order that is given by a human being (assuming it does not conflict with the first law).
  3. A robot can defend itself (as long as it does not conflict with the first or second laws).

When Detective Spooner is called to USR Robotics for the apparent suicide of its top scientist, Dr. Alfred J. Lanning, he is less than amicable to those who continually suggest that the deceased doctor’s death was definitely suicide. They think Det. Spooner’s theory that Lanning’s death could have been at the hands of a robot is just part of his prejudice towards them.  However, discovery of a robot named “Sonny,” that has been trained in human emotions and refers to Dr. Lanning as “my father” starts to lend credence to Spooner’s distrust – so much that USR leadership plans to deactivate him as they don’t want news of him to keep anyone from purchasing their newest release robot, the NS-5.

So, what can we gain from i,Robot? 

We are created for a purpose:  First, Sonny believes he was made for a purpose.  It’s kind of funny (to me) when he says “My father made me for a purpose.”  I find myself wondering if he was “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 149). Sorry, that was supposed to be a joke…  but in all seriousness, do we remember that we were made for a purpose?  Then the next question is if you are made for a purpose, are you fulfilling it?  Later on Sonny tells Spooner that he’s completed his purpose and doesn’t know what to do next.  Spooner tells him that he’ll have to find his way, just like the rest of us.  Do you think the purpose God planned for us can ever really be completed?  Are you still trying to find your purpose in life?

Don’t take the term “father” for granted:  Sonny refers to Dr. Lanning as “my father” and Det. Spooner corrects him to say “your designer.”  There is a distinct difference.  As a robot, Sonny shouldn’t care, but he does.  “Father” is a much more intimate term than “designer.”  So now think about that in terms of God.  Do you think of God as a father or a designer?  Most (if not all) Christian religious pray the “Our Father” and most that believe in God see him as a father figure of sorts.  But do we really take the term “father” to heart?  Or do we say “Father,” but really mean “designer.”  If so, do we even give Him designer credit?

Personal note:  I didn’t really think about this one for Father’s day – but you know how I’ve said  in my FAQ page that the Spirit seems to decide what movies I review and when. This one seems to be another example.  I have three other flicks I’ve got posts in progress for in various forms – but this one somehow got all the way to posted status without being relegated to the back.  It isn’t because I liked this one more or because it was easier to write about (it wasn’t), but it just felt like it needed to be done.  I hadn’t even really thought about the father aspect until I re-watched this movie as I started the post.

Protection is worth loss of some freedoms:  V.I.K.I cites that the robots must save us from ourselves because of our propensity of self-destruction by war and pollution and that in doing so, loss of some freedoms is a small sacrifice.  In some sense, we do this in our own government.  Think about all the laws that get enacted to protect (we’ll not argue whether or not they really do), but don’t they usually involve giving up some freedom?  It may not be a freedom we ever intended to use, but it’s a freedom nonetheless.

One could also argue that following the rules of a particular religion means loss of freedom.  However, isn’t it also freedom to choose that religion or those religious acts that is also freedom? 

Find your way like the rest of us, that’s what it means to be free:  This line from Det. Spooner to Sonny still plaques me.  Is finding our way what it means to be free?  Or is it that freedom gives us the ability to find our way?  I mean, I guess if we were in all the same, or programmed like robots, we wouldn’t have to worry about finding our place – we’d just know and there wouldn’t be any question to it. 

Maybe this is a trivial question, but I keep finding myself wondering what all the humans do since they have robots to handle so much of the work.  There are robots to do all your basic chores, demolish houses, clean up highway debris, work in the robot factory and help out in so many areas.  Even the cars have autopilot and only are driven by a human when requested.  It appears that humans are police and design robots and that’s about all. 

On the whole, i,Robot is an interesting trail of breadcrumbs with lots of action.  It’s rated PG-13.  There’s some very strong language (including at least one G-damn), a fully nude side side shot of Det. Spooner in the shower and lots of action violence against the robots (remember, they can’t harm humans, although they do rough them up a little) so the rating is well deserved.

I will say that I enjoy I,Robot.  It’s got just enough suspense, action and comedy for my poor pea brain to be entertained.  Hopefuly I’ve helped you go a little deeper if you decide to give I,Robot a try and I hope you do.

Blessings!

The Way

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Image borrowed from IMDB.com

Image borrowed from IMDB.com

For a while now I’ve wanted to talk about this movie, but haven’t been able to bring myself to do it.  Don’t ask why…I don’t know.

The Way refers to a trek known as el Camino de Santiago (the Way of St. James).  The 800 kilometer Way of St. James really exists, running from St. Jean Pied de Port, France to Santiago de Compostella.  In the movie The Way, Tom, played by Martin Sheen, is called to France to claim the body of his son, Daniel, who started the Way, but was killed in a sudden storm in the mountains.

It isn’t long when Tom decides to trek the Way that Daniel began.  Tom is angry and not a man of prayer, so setting out on a pilgrimage is a little odd, but armed with a box of Daniel’s ashes, he heads out.  He leaves small piles of ash at various points on the journey.  His intention may be to do the Way for his son, but Tom learns a lot about himself along the way.

Despite his constant requests for privacy and keeping to himself as much as possible, Tom is joined along the way by four individuals all as different as night and day.  Every time I see The Way I notice something different, so I’m sure if I review this post next year, I’ll have some completely different insights, but I finally feel like I have seen it enough times to do it some justice, so here we go.

You don’t choose a life, you live one:  Daniel travels and feels that he must see and experience all that life has to offer.  He and Tom disagree about the direction their lives are going.  Tom says, “It is the life I chose.”  Daniel responds with “You don’t choose a life, you live one.” 

How often do we find ourselves wrapped up in the daily grind, forgetting why we’re doing it in the first place?  I would suggest to you, that there is a happy medium.  You don’t have to travel the world to live life – Lord know that many do it, but it’s all work, or they feel like they have to check things off a list, but don’t bother to take in the true beauty of it all.  We’ve got to take in the true beauty of everyday life.  Make opportunities for memories but don’t forget to get lost in them from time to time.

When I was young, I was too busy.  Now that I am old, I am too tired:  This line hit me pretty hard.  I’m always begging people to let me get through the next big event before I have to worry about the issue looming.  Unfortunately, there’s always another big event and there’s always more issues.  But, deadlines have been a way to prioritize – and for a procrastinator, that’s been my method of operation for years.  I am trying to get better, but I still find myself longing for retirement, where I can do what I want, not having to worry about work deadlines and can move around more freely.  However, I have to remind myself that I run the risk of being “too tired” if I push everything off.  So, I encourage everyone to remember this phrase and live for today.  Maybe we can all hold each other accountable.  😉

Which guidebook are you using?  There is this competition between Tom and Joost over the “American Guidebook” or the “Dutch Guidebook.”  One is supposedly full of shortcuts and paths to the nearest party.  The other is supposed to be the preferred and most clear routes.  Neither is perfect and neither is the point of what I’m asking.  Think more globally – what guidebook(s) are you using for your life?    The Bible, the Catechism, the story or writings of your favorite saint, the latest self-help title, the Bhagavad Gita, the Koran?  The book is less of a concern, but how you live your life that matters.  Do you find yourself just going from party to party with no substance, or are you all substance with no party?  There is a happy medium between the two…  and that is the balance we’ve got to find before it’s too late.

Sometimes a dog fight near a cheese farm is just a dog fight near a cheese farm:  This is going to sound contradictory to 95% of what I say on this blog – but haven’t you known people who are so busy looking for meaning in everything that they miss what’s really going on. Our daily examination should help us find insight into what was important, and learn to downplay the things that really don’t mean anything.  We also have to realize that the meaning may not be obvious until some time later.

Why would you do The Way? They say you can’t do the Way for someone else, it is only for yourself.  What would make you take on a nearly 500 mile journey?  At 3 miles an hour, walking 12 hours a day – it would take two weeks. Would it be a prayer pilgrimage – saying continual rosaries, chanting novenas and such?  Would it be for health?  Would it be to clear you mind with hopes to hear the voice of God?  Would it be to meet people? 

Trekking the Way one of those things I’m putting on my bucket list, but I think God still has to tell me why.  It seems that way to many times I’ve been led into something for one reason, but it really works for others.  So, I don’t think it matters what I would think my reason for the trek would be, God will help me find what he wants me to find along the Way.The Way - Seashell

Make your own Way:  It’s obviously not in everyone’s life plan or abilities to make the pilgrimage of St. James.  However, you can make your own Way.  Pick small pilgrimages close to home.  Make mini pilgrimages in the back yard.  Join up with a group that you might not join and meet new people.  It’s all part of the Way.

For more information about the movie The Way, check out:  http://www.theway-themovie.com/

For more information about The Way of St. James, check out: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Way_of_St._James

Buen Camino!!!

October Baby

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Image borrowed from IMDB.com

Image borrowed from IMDB.com

Psalm 139:13You formed my inmost being;you knit me in my mother’s womb.

I wasn’t going to do this one so soon – since it’s sooooo obvious what this one means, but it’s light of the Kermit Gosnell trial it seems like it is necessary.  In a way, the feelings Hannah displays are contrary to what we want to display.  But I think when you reflect on the film, you’ll see it might have been resolved if she’d been told her story from the beginning.

Our main character, Hannah collapses on stage.  In an attempt to determine what caused it, many tests are run – which point to one cause of her issues – her birth.  She was adopted after a failed abortion attempt.  She then sets out on a journey with her friend and what they learn along the way helps her realize what life is really all about.

Have you ever felt unwanted?  Hannah writes in her journal (which comes to light after this episode) that she feels “unwanted.”  She was not told she was adopted until that moment, and certainly was never told that she was the product of a failed abortion or that she had a twin.  There’s a couple of thoughts I have here…  first, that even at such a young age, she may have felt the impact of what her biological mother tried to do.  She may not have been conscious of it, but somehow she knew.  Could this have been curtailed if her adoptive parents had been honest with her?  Could that knowledge of being chosen, being wanted, help her get past what her biological mother did?  There are also many people who never endured the tragedies Hannah survived, but still feel unwanted.  Is there any way to help these lost souls?

What other ways do we feel unwanted?  Obviously, there are many.  When your teenage child says that he or she hates you, when you’re turned down by someone you have feelings for, or when you’re excluded from a gathering.  How do you deal with those feelings of being unwanted?  What insights can you offer to someone dealing with feelings of being unwanted?

“To be human is to be beautifully flawed”  Wow…  that it the nicest way of saying that we all mess up I think I’ve ever heard.  Its true, as are the statements that follow it in the movie.  We are “beautifully flawed.”  A few years ago, I was at a family reunion.  A couple of my teenage distant cousins were there obviously showing that they were expecting.  I happened to be talking to some other relatives who commented about how those girls could let that happen, and how it was going to wreck their lives.  My comment to them, was that if they’d aborted their babies, no one would have known about their little buns – but that by owning up and continuing – they were stronger and more courageous than they were being given credit for.  And now, they have beautiful babies – the families have pitched in to help.  Beauty has come out of a difficult – maybe even ugly situation.  Sometimes really wonderful things come out of those flaws… 

“When you hear something enough times, you start to believe it”  In this case it’s referring to the “tissue” that the doctor kept telling the nurse that babies being aborted were.  I wonder if many pro-choicers would really still be pro-choice if they actually saw the product of the abortions.  When I look at today’s ultrasounds, where you really see a three-dimensional image of the baby – I wonder if people will start realizing it now. I wonder why someone would kill a baby that is born alive, despite the attempt to kill it, when babies are in such demand amongst those looking to adopt.  I know there are abortion survivors out there.  They aren’t “just tissue” any more than the rest of us are.

This same concept can be applied to our news sources and what we surround ourselves with.  When all we see is trash, or surround ourselves with is trash, that is all we will believe.  We have got to surround ourselves with good – and look for good in others.  Remember the old adage, “I think, therefore I am.”  We’ve got to think positive, and be aware of what’s going on around us.

Another point to be made here is about how we treat each other.  “When you hear something enough times, you start to believe it.”  If people area always telling you that you’re no good, you start to believe it after a while.  Thus seems to be the point of trying to build a child’s self-esteem by telling them “you can do it” or otherwise reinforcing their talents and skills.  We’ve got to build people up, not tear them down.  We do, however, have to be careful.  “Building up” does not mean spoil the child.  I’m afraid too many mistake the two concepts.

“Only in forgiveness can we be free.”  Matthew 16:19 tells us, “I will give you the keys to the kingdom of heaven. Whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.”  That makes it sound as thought we have power over others – which in some ways we do, but it’s that last part we should concentrate on.  Staying intent on binding others to their sins isn’t good for us.  Sort of like taking poison and expecting others to die from it.  We have to forgive and leave the rest to God.  It will be healthier for us mentally and spiritually.  I’ll admit, I have problems with this one, especially when I’ve been wronged more than once by the same person or group…  But, in the end, it’s up to God and I’ve got to let Him do what He feels is best.

Ultimately, although rare, babies born as early as twenty weeks gestation can survive.  In looking at this film in light of the Gosnell case, it seems to me that too many people underestimate the sheer will to survive in babies.  So when one hears the horrors of snipping spinal cords and drownings in the toilet, it is especially discouraging.  Why, when people are paying thousands of dollars to adopt babies, so women feel like aborting is the only option?  While we have to help young people understand the difference between right and wrong…  we also have to help them understand that we will help them when they find themselves in such a position.  If we want them to make the right choice, they have to know they can count on us, despite whatever disappointment we might feel that they didn’t make the right decision at the time the child was conceived.

Truth be known, this film probably needs another post to fully discuss all that it offers, but for now, know that it is a good clean film.  It is however, very serious, and some of the discussions about the “procedure” may be too graphic for young ears.

God Bless!

Rounders

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image borrowed from Wikipedia

image borrowed from Wikipedia

Mike McDermott: You can’t lose what you don’t put in the middle. [pause] But you can’t win much either.   (Source:  IMDB.com)I don’t know what it is about Rounders – maybe it is the fact that I first saw it while I was spending a semester abroad in Rome, maybe I’m just a Matt Damon fan…  or maybe I’m just a sucker for a good movie where the underdog comes out ahead, I don’t know…  I really can’t tell you why I like Rounders…  I just do.

We see Matt Damon’s character, Mike McDermott seems like he has a pretty good life; he’s a law student who’s apparently doing well, got a girlfriend who is also in law school, and things just appear to be going in the right direction.  However, when his childhood friend, Lester “Worm” Murphey, played by Ed Norton, gets released from prison, his whole world get turned upside down.  We learn that Mike is a former gambler and apparently used to get into a lot of trouble with Worm and that Worm took the fall, refusing to rat out Mike, a debt Mike still feels like he owes and Worm is all-too-willing to remind him of.

So, with all the gambling, language and nudity we see in Rounders, what can we learn?  I know you’re expecting me to say “know when to hold them, and know when to fold ’em,” admit it!!  =)

1.  Loyalty is wonderful, but sometimes you do have to let the past be the past.  So Mike feels like he owes Worm.  It’s honorable that he respects that life he has could have been very different if Worm hadn’t covered for him.  However, when you see how poorly Worm treats him and how manipulative Worm is, you’ll understand.  We also have to consider that people change.  We don’t get to see what the relationship was like when Mike and Worm were kids.  The relationship may not always have been that bad, we may have to realize that part of Worm’s problem is the time he spent in the system and how he learned to cope.  But no matter what, I’m not saying to turn on Worm immediately, but Mike probably should have set some limits much earlier in the game.

2.  Listen to those with experience.  Mike definitely has people who both serve as consultors and guardian angels.  Joey Knish keeps alerting Mike to issues, so does Petra, plus Professor Petrovsky is like the wise old sage.  Some of them Mike does a better job of listening to than others…  But he finally wised up and realized that they weren’t trying to hold him back, only help.  It’s hard to see that sometimes.  We all want to think we’re in control – but, that certainly isn’t always the case.  Sadly, even Jo has been down this road with Mike before, but he doesn’t listen to her and she finally gets fed up and leaves him.  If Mike had listened to any of them, he could have been spared a lot of pain.

3.  You can’t lose what you don’t put in the middle. But you can’t win much either.  I like to apply this one to just about anything you really want to do in life – and maybe even the things you don’t.  You don’t like math, you don’t invest yourself in it, you’re not going to get much out of it.  No matter what you want, you have to put in the effort.  The same goes for our faith.  We have to put a little work in to get anything out of it.  I get really frustrated with the “pew potatoes” that want to gripe about church, about not understanding the Mass, the Bible or the Catechism but won’t bother to try to remedy it and through self-study or learning opportunities at church.  Put in the effort – you may not be rewarded in the way you think, but you will be rewarded.

4. Know your limits.  Now, don’t take this to think I’m rescinding the previous paragraph or that there’s no point in dreaming, or working toward a goal.  But, you do have to know when you really need to change the game plan. You do have to consider how your decisions will affect not just you, but your family and others who depend on you.  You have to consider if the risk is worth the price.

5.  Don’t be afraid to ask for help.  When Mike finally realizes the depth of his trouble he does get help.  It’s humbling, but sometimes we really have to do it.  Asking for help takes many forms, it can be financial, educational, social, spiritual, etc.  We all have to do it at some point – we aren’t perfect, as much as we may strive to be.

Gambling addiction…  now, I didn’t mention anything about gambling addiction because I don’t think that’s what this movie is about.  There may be some addiction, but I think the point of the movie is the bond between Worm and Mike, and showing how two boys raised in similar straits are set apart by one event that affects them the rest of their lives, and how they deal with that based on their experiences.

So, Rounders is rated R for good reason.  I was serious about the gambling (duh), nudity (some scenes are set in a strip club, plus others that are just a way to show how bad things are), and the language is at times very vulgar.  But I don’t think we’d get a true sense of the seriousness of the setting if the filmmaker had toned things down for a PG-13 rating.  So don’t plan on watching it with youngsters around.  But, it’s still an enjoyable movie and one with a few good lessons if you’re willing to give it a chance.